my journey to love myself

How I got depression? I suffer from anxiety first then followed by depression. This is my list for sources of my depression.

1.     I don’t make decision in my life

2.    My sister makes me think that I am a bad daughter

3.    I can not go out and have fun with my friends

4.    If I go out more than 3 hours my mom will call me asking when will I go home

5.    My siblings made me look after their children

6.    I have a very big family but only I do the chores

7.    I always end up crying when I am exhausted

8.    I tend to say yes to everything since they will scold me after

9.    I hate my life

10.  Sometimes, I thinks it is better if I die

11.   I pray and pray hoping that god will change a lot of things in my life

12.  I suffered a lot please give me my happiness

13.  I just want to love myself so that I would not have any suicidal thought. I am not asking for more. It is not like I am asking for a handsome rich prince to love me.

14.  Why is everything so hard. I am tired of breathing every single day.

15.  When someone excited in doing something, I don’t have that feeling. I felt nothing at all

16.  Do you remember the feelings that makes you want to cry? Well, I feel it everyday even when I don’t have anything to cry about?

I feel that I am hopeless, worthless and helpless. I don’t deserve anyone’s love because of I am in no place to receive them.

#loveYourself

#lovemyself

#howtobeagoodfriendtome

#challengetoloveyourself

#letsalltrythischallenge

#challenges